Preparations for the the 3rd annual Kieron Go Bragh (2009) have begun and it looks like the race has found a new home - Frisco! Frisco is home to not only my family and Christine's, but also the new home my mom and brother Damon.

It's mid-August as I write, no doubt Kieron's favorite time of year as it's the dawning of another football season...his faves were Notre Dame (excpet when he attended SMU in early 80's) and the Cowboys. Don't know that he would like the upcoming inaugural kick-off at Dallas' new state-of- the-art facility...Kieron liked old school. Part of our bond was sealed watching the Cowboys play at Irving's Texas Stadium. Sounds like typical armchair quarterback talk, but we were passionate fans....young, having fun, and not knowing days like those, spent together cheering fervishly for our Cowboys, were numbered.

Picks has completely riddled Kieron's mind these days. Noone knows for sure even when the disease set in...but it's obvious to me and the few that see Kieron frequently that he's at the latter stages. He's but a shell of the vibrant, uniquely colorful and insightful person we all grew up with and admired.

But I've written enough about the tragic facet of it all, the unfairness...life's cards are mysterious and often as unfair as Goliath, but the backbone of the foundation and the 5k is built upon fighting for a cure and I want for this space to focus on raising awareness about the disease.

Kieron's family, this race, has as its focus to grow numbers and in turn dollars fighting against this cognitive brain disease known as Pick's. And so our efforts are concentrated on making the 3rd Kieron Go Bragh Foundation again bigger than the last.

Good night bro...i used to not think it a good idea but I will make sure that you are present at this year's race. And I look forward to seeing you at the finish line.

r u awake?

Wondering if Kieron is awake grasping any memory he might have, and if so if perhaps it's a memory of him and me.

A recent one occured 10 days ago on his 48th birthday, when the two of us and our mom celebrated the special occasion eating his cake, and drinking a cold beer. He didn't/couldn't say a word but flashed several smiles. No doubt he was happy and although his disease makes these types of moments fleeting, it was special.

Noone knows how much we need him these days. What is Picks? How/why is he one of the few?

Kieron

3 months after the Kieron Go Bragh run and only now do I write about what a great success it turned out to be...

But it was only a race, and though the cause is so very worthwhile, my brother falls deeper into the dregs of this dreadful disease.

Kieron Finnegan is special. Ask me how special and I'll gladly tell anyone with an interest. Though a shell of his essence, he remains special. Embedded in my heart - and I curse the day his true essence came to a halt - is how special he is.

I love you Kieron. I never told you how much I love you. We never told each other. But we lived it, and shared it, didn't we. And I miss you. I'm sorry.

Times like these...

The archetype big brother has been written about before. To me, it's a mixed feeling of idolatry and comfort...that when he's with you, you feel no fear and an enormous sense of security.

It's camping in the cold, and being asked if you're warm...and when you answer "no", it's your big brother uncovering himself with one of only two blankets, draping you with both, then leaving the tent to find more firewood so he can add to the dwindling fire. I figure he did this without thinking because already his heart was warm enough. I figure too that he inherited his warm heart from our father.

How could I not feel this warm feeling of comfort when we were together, as there are many recollections like this...

Like the time my skin had been scorched by the Texas sun on a June fishing trip, and he of the same fare skin soaked towels in cold water and baking soda and laid them across my back.

Like the time when I was 15 and after violently breaking my ankle he sprinted a 1/2 mile to safety, cradling me in his arms like his own. It was the only time I ever wept in front of him. He never mentioned it.

And like the time he surprised me in CT, after just landing in NYC from France and making the three hour drive just to watch me pitch. It was the only time any of my family watched me play high school baseball. He made it for the first pitch. We won, and he took me to dinner that night where we had a celebratory beer. It was the first beer I'd ever had in a restaurant - he ordered it for himself and covered me (I was underage) as I proudly drank it.

It times like these that I miss about Kieron. He was the brother that people write about.

Kieron Go Bragh 2009

Goals give life more purpose, right? We accomplish some and fail at others. Success sometimes can be measured by those which we accomplish. Just as much, our failures quickly turn into valuable life lessons. Thus, establishing goals and pushing to meet them can only lead to good, even while failing.

My goal for the 2009 KGB 5k is 400 participants. That would be about double the amount of runners this year...very reachable. The long term goal is to find a cure for cognitive brain diseases...a dream of a goal, maybe impossible in my lifetime.

But if the race grows every year there is a chance.

Wanted to write this somewhere....400 4 2009 is the challenge for next year!

Post Race

My family and I created Kieron Go Bragh Foundation and the Kieron Go Bragh 5k for a couple of reasons. First, there needed to be a charity in place to raise funds for Pick's Disease. In the medical world it's a relative unknown. Second, in the face of this God-awful tragedy that our family now knows, we were emotionally compelled to cling to something that might counter our deep sorrow and ensure that Kieron not be forgotten. Thus the name, Kieron Go Bragh, or, Kieron Forever.

Words cannot describe the sadness that one feels when a loved one is stricken with a terminal disease. I didn't know that until now...now, as reality has it, I know it very well and I wish it on no one. Watching the disease progress is hell. But what I witnessed this weekend at the race allowed me to draw a positive out the single most negative occurrence in my life.

We've never established a charitable foundation and so when we set out on this crusade in the summer of 2007 none of us really knew what to expect. We were just trying to make something worthwhile out of this unluckiness.

After the second annual Kieron Go Bragh 5k, I know the true meaning of gratitude, and thankfulness. To sit back and watch a fledgling cause grow into a real, vital, meaningful entity is in a word, fulfilling.

Several participants approached me over the weekend and thanked me and my family for putting on the race. But the real thanks goes to the Center for Brain Health and all its volunteers, Run On Texas who implemented all the logistics, and especially to all the runners and donors who contributed to the Kieron Go Bragh Foundation and "Ran for Research". Without all of you, our cause would still be fledgling.

The race grew by well over 100%, meaning research funds grew by that much too. We've now got momentum and head into the 2009 race with great expectations.

To the returning runners, to the new runners, to all the kind people who travelled from out of town to participate, to all those who sent in donations, the Finnegan family extends a warm thanks and big dose of gratitude. We're overwhelmed.

My brother Kieron was big on kind deeds. He'd think this massive showing of support and fight was something to talk about.

Let's keep the momentum strong and continue to make Kieron Go Bragh a known cause.

Thanks to everyone, and KIERON GO BRAGH-
Michael Finnegan

Kieron's tunes

It's late Thursday night, two eves before the second annual Kieron Go Bragh 5k. For the race this year I made a song list...

Like Kieron I'm not high on cliches but it was bittersweet selecting which songs to blair over the sound system down at Reverchon Park in a few days.

The criteria was easy for me. Kieron was into his music. I'm sure his taste in music was heavily influenced by his high school days in the late 70's and one year of prep school in New England in 1980. So, the song list has a heavy dose of the sign of those times: The Who, Pink Floyd, The Eagles and The Boss, who he became enamored with at the one year of boarding school.

But his taste was also peppered with artists like Sinatra, Neil Diamond, and Willie Nelson. I included singles off soundtracks from his favorite movies. Lastly, selfishly, I added some songs that reminded me of him.

Like most friends, we liked listening to music together. Songs evoke such powerful memories, thus the bitter sweetness of this exercise. Our favorite were old Springsteen songs. We'd set out on a road trip and a constant part of our preparation, other than loading up poles, a cooler, and our dog, was choosing the music for the drive.

Several songs come to mind tonite, but one especially is Springsteen's Fade Away, one of his less popular but all-time greats. Another more popular Boss song I'm reminded of is No Surrender, one we'd sing in awful unison. One verse always gets me, and brings me back to those drives:

"Well, now young faces grow sad and old, And hearts of fire grow cold, We swore blood brothers against the wind, Now I'm ready to grow young again"...

Born to Run was Kieron's favorite and in a way seems fitting for our event the day after tomorrow!